Why Are You Single?

By Kaci Cooper, 20 Jan 11:58

This article provides reasons for women as to why they are single and how they need to love themselves before they can find a man.

Why are you single? Seriously. Ask yourself that question. Is it because you are ugly? Do you weigh too much? Did your last break up wound you so terribly that you will never love again? Do you spend most of your time alone in your home or apartment leaving only to obtain food and go to work?

If you answered “yes” to any of the above questions, then that is the reason you are single. Let’s address why you being ugly or fat has nothing to do with you being single, and in fact you, not the guys you wish would date, are the problem.

There is no such thing as ugly. Have you ever heard the phrase, “All girls are beautiful?” Despite Plato’s refreshing belief that beauty is not in the eye of the beholder but in the beheld, beauty is different to every individual. Not being a size two blonde with an airbrushed complexion does not mean that you are not the most beautiful person in the world to some guy. If there is a guy that you want and his reason for not dating is that you’re not pretty enough, then he is not the guy you should be dating.

If you fall into the category above and truly believe that the reason you cannot find a man is your looks, then I have a project for you. Go talk to a guy, any guy- a coworker, the guy at Starbucks, your best guy friend- and ask him what his idea of beauty is. Chances are, he won’t say a size two blonde. Also, the good guys will fall in love with you for your personality and you will be beautiful because they love you. That’s the kind of beauty you want anyway, because it will not fade because you get wrinkles.

Guys don’t care what you weigh. They’re more interested in proportions. In fact, some guys dig heavy women. Most men like women with curves. They want someone they can hold without feeling like they’re going to break them or hurt their hand if they happen to bump against the girl’s elbow.

It’s all about confidence. If you feel disgusting because you believe you weigh more than you should, then exercise. The exercise will make you feel more confident and energetic, but exercise for you, not some guy because the guy probably doesn’t care if have some extra baggage. The extra is just more to love, right?

If you have gotten up the energy to look up this article, then you’re starting to get over your last break up. And it’s time that you do just that- GET OVER IT! He’s gone. He left for a reason and if he wants to come back, he’ll find you. But think about what you have to offer a relationship, it’s probably a lot. You have to move on, so that you can be happy again.

This doesn’t mean that you have to get serious with someone right away. You have options. He cared about you, someone else will too. Recognize that you weren’t the only to suffer a loss from the end of that relationship and go see what else is out there. If that guy left you, then you can do better. So go out and do better. Stop waiting. You only get one chance to live your life.

If you answered yes to the last question, then you are probably sitting in your bedroom right now reading this article. It’s time to leave your bedroom. Prince Charming is not going to simply show up at your door and ask you to marry him. If he does, I suggest you shut your door.

Go join a class or start walking your dog at a dog park where there are plenty of single men. You have to get out there to find someone. No matter how great and wonderful you are, you have to be present for someone to ask you out. Also, men love women who are passionate about something. So think about the last thing you were really passionate about. If it was reading books, then join a book club. If it was an art class back in college, sign up for one now. The important thing is to be available to get asked out.

If you want to be in a relationship, then you will find a relationship. So what’s stopping you? You have to figure out what scares you about yourself or the actual possible relationship and get over that fear in order to find the perfect guy. Maybe you need to date someone that you don’t have much chemistry with as a practice round to get your confidence up or maybe you’re just not ready yet. But when you are ready, you’ll find someone.

Tags: Single; Finding a man; alone; dating; love; loving again